The cold Wisconsin winter has set in; it's snowing, frigid, it gets dark early.  It makes a dog dream of sunny climes and the lure of a surfboard on a sandy beach.  You may be surprised to learn that certain dogs have the ability to "hang paws" , but it's true.  There are various Surf Dog competitions around the country which demonstrate our seafaring talent, our love of competition and challenge.  The fact that we might get wet in the process is the only negative I can think of.  Luckily, humans set up these contests in areas where surfing is relatively safe, where the curl is somewhat controlled, and the dogs are experienced competitors, not rash amateurs.  Surfing doesn't appeal to, or come naturally to all dogs.  Some of us are loathe to dip a toe in a rain puddle, much less ride the pipeline.  Surfing the swell can be swell, for the right dog, in the right place, at the right time. 

Some animals have written that surfing is a metaphor for life.  It's a competition.  We try to find the perfect wave and failing in that quest causes "dukkha", suffering.  We watchfully wait for that perfect wave to form, to be in the right place for the break, to time the curl. Of course, even if you're in the right place at the right time, it won't matter if you never had surfing lessons. Even if you're a natural, such as I.

What if these animals are correct, and life comes down to grabbing your board each morning and heading out into the ocean in search of success, or even mere survival. No matter what the weather, even though the shore may be rocky, sustenance can only be obtained by getting up on the board and finding balance.  Animals would need to be taught early on what the game is, would have to learn how to navigate the waves at an early age. The nature of the experience would depend on the nature of the seas that they individually encounter. Some are born into calm, some into calamity.  For some the shore is rocky, for others silky soft sand.  Storms will arise, and even skill and nurtured ability may be inadequate in the face of a maelstrom.  Other surfers may get in the way, their boards sharp and dangerous.  Even gentle waves may hide riptides, seabed obstacles, sharks.  Getting through a day in the surf unscathed is a challenge.  Taking that board out every day will take its toll on those who are ill prepared, who live on rocky shores, who have the ill fortune to be buffeted by stormy seas. Those who are taught early, who live in placid conditions on gentle seas, will wonder what's so tough about this surfing thing and continue working on their tans.

Some animals, humans and dogs included, enjoy surfing.  For those who don't like the water, who never learned to balance on a board, there's still the challenge of "surfing" through samsara.  The experience will be different for each organism, the lessons learned will be unique in accordance with the animal's nature.  Some will thrive in the wake of the challenge, others will drown as they are overcome by the pounding surf.  Achieving blessed balance is the goal; in the midst of a long ride, in the tube of a perfect wave, as it breaks on a sunny shore. Is it summer yet?

It is well known that dogs are inspirational beings; their faces have launched a thousand ships, they have been the subject of odes, they've engendered musical compositions created by some of the great artists of our time.  Whatever the genre; country, rock, pop or showtune, dogs and their attributes have provided the subject matter and great artists have provided the lyrics and melodies that have set tails wagging the world over.  If you have ever walked behind a dog, and seen the sway of the hips and haunches, you'll understand where Hank Ballard and Chubby Checker got the idea for the Twist from.  Shake it a Baby, Twist and Bark.  Beatles Lennon and McCartney wrote about Bulldogs and Dear Martha.  Even Monkees and Byrds wrote and sang songs about dogs.  We unite the planet with our interspecies appeal. 

Who can forget the dog inspired classics like "Me and You and a Dog Named Boo".  You all remember Lobo's long career. In case you forgot, have a listen to this blast from the past.

Dogs were intimately involved in the career of Frank Sinatra. "Mama Will Bark!" was one of his most accomplished recordings.  I think it ranks right up there with "New York, New York" and "Night and Day" amongst his greatest interpretations.

The Beatles found it necessary to write dog songs to further their otherwise faltering careers.  We provided the spark that made them legends, at least that's how it's played up in our musical periodical, The Rolling Bone.
Pink Floyd wrote "Dogs", George Clinton, "Atomic Dogs", Henry Nillson wrote "The Puppy Song" and Cat Stevens, "I Love My Dog."  "Bingo" was her name I've heard, and there went "Mandy" and "Brandy"  and "Martha, My Dear"
A dog song lends good karma to a musician's career, as it is usually written with love and affection, though there are a few exceptions like "Hounddog".

Old Blue was a good old dog, and someone put $5 on the line betting on it.  Five dollars was a lot of money back then, so that dog must have been something.  I hope people say that about Old Buffy some day! There was "Old King" by Neil Young, "Black Dog" by Led Zeppelin, and "Diamond Dogs" by Bowie.  Dogs should have their own channel on Sirius (The Dog Star)

If you haven't got one or two already, go on out and buy yourself a dog. Treat her well, and she just might inspire you to write a hit song.  Look what we did for all of these other guys.

Old Buffy
Good Old Dog Too

I wasn't around when Pluto first appeared in Mickey Mouse cartoons back in 1930. The loyal, friendly bloodhound first appeared as a nameless pup in  "The Chain Gang" and then as "Rover"  before he was finally given the name Pluto and took his place as Mickey's pet.  Unlike Goofy, Pluto was not anthromorphized except for humanlike facial expressions.  His vocabulary was limited to "Grrrrr"  and "snort" and similar common animal sounds. Unlike most of the animals in the Disney universe, he had no speaking voice.  Still he managed to appear in 48 of his own cartoons, and was named #1 on  a list of The Greatest Animated Pets of All Time. He had great friends like Goofy, Fifi the Peke, Dinah the Dachsund and Ronnie the St. Bernard. You would think that Pluto would be a leading dog by now, that he would be starring in his own movies, that he would have his own theme park, but sadly it is not so.  You almost need a telescope to spot Pluto's fortunes these days. 

The fortunes of Pluto have taken a turn for the worse the last few years.  Discovered in 1930 by Percival Lowell's Observatory, the dwarf planet was thought to be the mysterious "Planet X" that was the source of perturbations of the orbit of neighboring Neptune.  The dark, cold world was named after the Greek God of the Underworld and became even more famous when a certain Disney Dog took the same name later that year. Plutonium, the powerful element was named after Pluto.  Now it seems Pluto has been demoted, lost its Star, er Planet, status.  It's just another member of the Kuiper Belt, part of a boy band, no longer a lead. Pluto has been relegated to second rate status, the appellation seems to be having a bad run.  Perhaps it has lost the favor of the gods.

You have to have a certain amount of size and girth to be nominated as a planet. You need to clear the neighborhood around your orbit as they witness your gravity. Associating with the right rocks and stars is paramount.  You have to be in the correct orbit, or they'll write your obit as planetary material.  Plutoing is now in the dictionary as a verb meaning to demote or devalue someone or something. In 2007, "plutoed" was named word of the year by the American Dialect Society.  Plutoed, it's not a word that you want associated with your life these days, whether you're a dog, or a human. Or even if you're just a cold dark rock.

Pluto, the name comes from the Greek "Plouton" which means "giver of wealth". The god Pluto was also known in mythology as Hades, and he was ruler of the underworld.  While Hades was associated with gloom, cold, darkness and death, Pluto was given a more positive character as the source of the earth's bounty, both the crops on the surface and the mines of precious metals within.  This is probably why Pluto the dog was named Pluto instead of Hades. Pluto is positive, or at least he was, before he and his planet was plutoed.  You don't hear much about the Greek gods anymore. I guess they've been devalued and demoted. People don't congregate around Mt.Olympus like they used to, offering sacrifices and seeking favor.  Pluto's brand hasn't had a great decade, I hope this doesn't enrage Pluto, and lead him to envelop the earth in cold, darkness and death. (I'm talking about the god Pluto here,  and not the lovabable dog, who is always sunny and happy regardless of the current status of his fame.)
In case this Pluto god has a mind to send us all to Hades, I recommend a program of appeasement and propitiation.
Please send precious metals and gems to the address below, and I'll see to it that Pluto's property is returned to him. Perhaps he won't pluto us, if we don't pluto him. I'm not a big fan of cold, dark death. Maybe a new movie starring Pluto (the dog) would help stave off impending doom.

Buffy
Pluto Promoter and Propitiator
1234 Buffy Lane
Racine, WI 53402

Dateline June 30, 2099

The historic, first state sanctioned marriage between two animals of different species occurred in Biloxi, Mississippi on Saturday, June 30th.  The ceremony was held on the steps of the state capitol, and was attended by Governor James Kurt Kerry and his wife Deborah.  The liberal governor was instrumental in shepherding the so called "Scanner" Amendment through the constitutional amendment process.  Mr. Scanner, the Pulitzer Prize winner who became the Ernest Hemingway of his generation, first put forth the idea of interspecies pet marriage in 2010. Buffy Kastenholz's treatise, The Rights of Animals written in 2011 provided the intellectual and philosophical underpinnings for the Animal Rights movement. Mississippi, the most liberal state in the union, put the amendment over the top, as it was the 38th state to ratify the 30th amendment to the nation's constitution. 

Reaction was mixed in the nation's capitol.  Many were afraid to offend the animals, who have gained political power as they have inherited an increasing proportion of the nation's wealth.  It was only 15 years ago that Human-Animal marriage was first legalized in the US.  Conservatives proclaimed at the time that this was confirmation of their predictions that  gay and lesbian marriage would lead to a slippery slope, and cause the end of civilization as we know it. Liberals pointed out that they are still waiting for gay-lesbian marriage to be legalized, and that conservatives have wed animals at a rate 7 times that of liberals. The power of the animal lobby was evident throughout the process, as they outspent their opponents by 120 billion dollars, and threatened to withhold their services as pets if they didn't get their way.  Their ads pointed out that since animals have gained political power, and Human -Animal marriage has been legalized, peace and prosperity has reigned in the land.  Europe, which embraced this philosophy thirty years ago has become an economic powerhouse, with millions of hard working animals providing a new consumer base. Churches have been somewhat mute throughout the process. Buddhists and Unitarians see animal rights as a natural extension of their beliefs. Catholics and Protestants see fertile territory for new converts and contributions. "It's a New World Order" proclaimed Skip Bush, First Dog of the President,
"Animal power will lead to Peace and Prosperity. We're all Animals Now!"  An amendment allowing animals to vote is just beginning its ratification process, and is expected to pass easily.  

Unofficial Dog Marriage Has Long Been a Tradition in Some Communities

It used to be that a dog could count on a headline like "MAN BITES DOG" to garner immediate attention and concern, generate voluminous hits from incredulous readers, and cause an outpouring of sympathy for the canine victim.  Nowadays people read about this type of animal on animal assault and react with a yawn. They wonder what the dog's politics were, as if perhaps the dog deserved to be bitten.  Maybe the Fido was sniffing around the garbage looking for some food, or seeking shelter in the man's yard.  You know how bothersome these animals can be.   Surely the dog wasn't innocent.  Who is, after all?  Still there used to be a certain decorum that humans followed. It was a more civilized world at one point, wasn't it?  Dogs can sometimes be noisy, often annoying, perhaps sloppy even dangerous at times. In the past men coped with these canine shortcomings in various and sundry ways; they weren't always pretty, but at least in certain sophisticated segments of society, there was an attempt to invent a model of conflict resolution that didn't appeal to the animal passions, that relied on reason rather than emotion, that promoted civility rather than crassness.  When a dog listens to human discourse today, he has a certain wariness that's been downloaded into him by the assault on his senses, by continuous human argument and discord. Even dogs get tired of barking after awhile, or at least you can use a muzzle on a noisy dog. We dogs are afraid that humans might be heading in the wrong direction, descending rather than ascending, becoming more animal than angel.  We are here to appeal to your higher instincts, for your sake and for our own protection.  Human bites are very painful.  Sensitive dogs are concerned, we don't want to add another shot to our vaccine regime. 

Some may think that I'm exaggerating the number of incidents in which humans bite dogs; perhaps I'm throwing in hot dog eating contests, or including Chinese cuisine into the mix; spinning things in a desirable dog direction in order to beef up my case.  Let me assure you that is not true, this time. Dogs don't have the kind of intellectual chops to engage in spin, or to massage the data in studies in order to get the intended results.  It's not for want of trying, but we just aren't that creative or manipulative.  That MAN BITES DOG! headline might be something a human uses to draw attention to his newspaper or magazine, or to advance his agenda.  When it comes to dogs however, such a statement sets off alarm bells, it makes us wonder if the world has gone topsy-turvy.  A topsy-turvy world sounds scary, although I must admit I've never experienced one.  From my point of view, I'm too old for novel experiences such as these right now. Perhaps a topsy world would be okay, or one that is just slightly turvy, but topsy and turvy at the same time would undoubtedly set off my vertigo.

There was a time when you could count on a world that was stable under your four feet. I'm sure you remember this and agree.  Balance was ideal, no falling down. Now I often feel as if the bedrock has gone soft, as if I'm walking on marshmallows.  There ought to be an arrow of civilization that a dog can depend on. As best friends, we need a species that we can look up to for intellectual guidance, moral authority, a model of socioeconomic political comity.  As we listen to humans converse, on the television, on the radio, as we peruse the blog headlines and breathlessly follow internet rumors and innuendo; dogs begin to worry that humans are sounding more like animals these days, hissing and snarling, teeth bared, ready to bite. It's scary!  We're concerned for the mental and physical health of our best friends, and just as a side note, for our own safety.  If you notice dogs running to the other side of the road when we see a human coming, you'll know why. Musn't Show fear, musn't show fear, musn't show fear.

Buffy
Topsy Never Turvy Standard Poodle

Whenever I'm with the other dogs, and "piggishly" eat the whole bowl of food that was supposed to be shared amongst all of us; when I  demand a walk even though the master is dog tired from a long day's work and just wants to rest; whenever I'm feeling guilty at my own uncharacteristically selfish behavior, I think back to where I, as an animal came from; and this reflective reverie allows me to relieve my feelings of inadequacy and assign the blame to the real culprits; the inciting instigators; those selfish genes that direct my decisions from their domicile in my DNA, their casa in my chromosomes. This theory lets me off the hook psychologically, gives me an excuse for my pathology, an explanation for my avarice.  I am as I was born to be, a survival machine, an unwitting tool of my selfish genes, carrying out my main purpose; the replication and transmission of those genes into the next generation. Whether I fulfill my purpose or not my body eventually dies.  My genes however, are, "immortal coils shuffling off an endless succession of mortal ones. " Me being one of those "mortal ones". I don't know about you, but I feel so used!

If I'm being controlled by ancient replicators that have survived millions of years by creating near exact copies of themselves, and then repeatedly inserting themselves into the machinery of succeeding generations, I guess I should just sit back and enjoy the ride.  These genes are part of the reason why my body is here to tell the tale.  Only successful genomes live to author their autobiographies.  These genes have used animal bodily processes to spread their presence, mindlessly but effectively.  Cold viruses cause coughs, which enable the virus to jump from machine to machine.  The rabies virus induces foaming at the mouth, wandering, and biting behavior which facilitates the spread of that menace.  I guess a dog can't help it if he or she is selfish.  It's not in our biological nature to be selfless and cooperative, it doesn't make evolutionary sense, unless such behavior can lead to increased reproduction of the genome.  Still, certain dogs and some primates with insight and intelligence can see how it might make sense to increase the welfare of all, even if it involves a short term expense to ourselves.  This altruism will usually apply only to those who are closely related to us, and share our genes or some fraction of them.  Those wily genes are ubiquitous, far reaching, they  weave a web of influence that extends as far as the host organism's physical and behavioral effects reach.  The expression of selfish genes is the world as you see it today, the extended phenotype is the physical form those genes take under the influence of this certain environment, and radiates out further in the ultimate selfish or altruistic behavior that those forms undertake. The phenotypic effects of a gene are "all the effects that it has on the world."

Animals, as they appear today, look like discrete, autonomous organisms making their own decisions based on the wants and needs of their physiology.  You don't see the remnants of ancient battles, the mergers and acquisitions, the cooperation and antagonism that symbiosis and parasitism produced during the competition that our genes endured over millennia.  Animals, advanced forms of gene congregation, continue to seek the right balance of selfishness and cooperation, to allow the propagation of their underlying genomes, and the success of their progeny.  Some believe that, by understanding that we are always under the influence of "selfish" influences, we can seek to overcome this tendency in ordering our society by an act of will, and make informed decisions for the long term good.  Genes aren't capable of making decisions that factor in the long term, unless there is some tortuous chain of feedback that reinforces "altruistic" behavior.  Intelligence is that ability which is able to take initiatives to transcend faulty wiring that generates damaging genetic dogma. For those who say that this is akin to " asking a school of piranhas to become vegetarians " I say shame on you for being so negative.  After all, society has made it this far, despite the selfish tendencies that we have inherited as part of our nature. If our technology doesn't destroy us, we might still make it!  Greed is good, when its my greed, or when it benefits my close relatives and progeny.  That's not my opinion, my genes told me to write that.  I need to continue to curry their favor, since I haven't done my part in advancing their interests by producing a litter or two.  I blame that failing on the selfish genes of my master, who had me "fixed" when I was just a pup.  (My genes have instructed me to tell you that I am available for cloning, if that process becomes a viable option.) Just think, endless copies of Buffy wandering the planet.  Surely mutual cooperation and benevolence would follow from such an occurrence.  (Wink)

Buffy
Standard Poodle Survival Machine

Richard Dawkins- Evolutionary Biologist.  Under the Control of Selfish Genes.

Selfish Dog Test - Take One

There's nothing like the experience of vigorous competition between closely paired contestants, when it comes to invoking a certain exhilaration in the animal spirit. Adrenaline surges, concentration sharpens, muscle fibers stretch to their limit.  Endorphins bathe the brain; the nagging aches and the usual acknowledgement of physical and mental limit vanishes. In a short race, the animal will never catch this second wind, will never experience the chemistry that creates meditation in the midst of excitation.  Short races are about pain. Lungs ache, muscles burn, hypoxia punishes; the animal must fight through it to reach the prize.  The longer contest of endurance will allow for a period of biological balance, when all parts are working together; the supply chain is conveying oxygen, removing lactic acid, the machinery hums. Then as the finish line nears, it again becomes a test of tolerance of pain; mental and physical.  Finally there is the reward, the end goal and the pack waiting to bark its approval for a race well run.  The winner is celebrated, while the other participants congratulate and commiserate. At the highest levels of animal experience,  there is genuine respect and admiration amongst the competitors; both for their fellow participants and their sacrifices, and also for the spirit of contest, and the idea of competition in itself. 

My subdivision, Wind Meadows, is known throughout the region for the dog races that we stage throughout the year.  Well, perhaps I exaggerate. We are well known to dogs, within the immediate region of our race track, which is the path around the pond across the way. We run races throughout the year, no matter what the weather.  We race individually and as sled teams.  Our Dog Race league has ten divisions, the greyhounds gravitate to the top group, the dachsunds often descend to dwell in the lower division.  Trophies are awarded at the end of the season at a huge Beef and Bone Banquet. Each division has a winner who is honored for his achievements, but we are all better in the end for the experience of comraderie and competition. The Dog Race League acts as a common bond between the breeds, and makes us realize that no matter what the circumstances are in our home lives, we are welcome and honored as dogs when we gather for the Races. Different breeds tend to exhibit characteristic strengths and weaknesses. The Greyhounds tend to win the sprints, the Huskies usually win the sled races, but the Dachsunds often win the Congeniality award. (Although a Poodle snuck in there one year back in 2005).  Amongst dogs, the Congeniality Award is the highest prize.

Competition is a first principle of animal experience.  Our ancestors lived or died, succeeded or failed, and as a result we are here as their representatives in the continuing amazing race of life.  The dogs in our subdivision have worked hard to create a Dog Race League that engenders that true spirit of competition, while at the same time remembering that, whether a dog wins or loses often depends on the what the rules are, and who makes them.  In a limbo league, the Dachsunds would have dominion.  In a league where you have to be over 4 feet tall to participate, the Great Dane would probably predominate. Nature has codified strength and intelligence as competitive advantages, but domestication has allowed for dogs of varying characteristics to contest. Dogs do what they can to contain and corral some of the cruelties that competition can create. We've succeeded to a large extent in organizing a league where all participants are honored for their efforts, their abilities, and also for their congeniality and good will.  If you've never witnessed the Wind Meadows Dog Races, there's probably a good reason for this.  Due to our experiences watching adult humans perform at their children's sporting events, and witnessing the practices  engaged in during human competition in politics and commerce, we banned humans from watching our races many years ago.  We love you as our best friends, but our Dog Race League is something of an experiment, and we hope to include you later, when we've got it perfected. Dogs don't have egos, or use money as an indicator of worth, which may go a long way in explaining why our league is so successful. As for me, I'm an old dog now, and no longer race.  Still, I'll always remember my Canine Congeniality Award in Division Ten back in 2005.  Top Dog, that was me! (No competitive ego there:)

The house has undergone its usual December transformation over the last few weeks.  The sights and sounds of Christmas have revealed themselves as the tree has been trimmed, the lights are aglow, holiday music plays. A dog gets excited about these events, just as humans do.  When I was a pup, I could only appreciate the spirit of the season and the festive animal vitality of the winter solstice. I never paid attention to, or understood the various meanings of, the unique words that appear in carols and conversation, the special language that speaks of Christmas. An older dog learns to appreciate the finer details of linguistics, as she becomes more refined with advancing age:)

Christmas Meanings                                                    

Choirs,Candles,Cookies Cutting,
Carols!
Magi,Mary and Magic Mornings,
Music!
Tidings,Tannenbaum,Trees a Trimming,
Toyland!
Geese,Glorias,Gaily Gliding,
Gladsome!
Parties,Partridge,Prayerful Praising,
Presents!
Radiance,Rising, All Redeeming,
Rudolph!
Bobtails,Beauty,Blizzards Blowing,
Blessed!
Flurries, Fruitcake, Fires Flaming,
Frosty!
Adoring,Advent,All Abiding,
Angels!
Horses,Hopeful,Holly Hanging,
Heaven!
David,Drummers,Delightful Dancing,
Dasher!
Stables,Silent, Santa Sleighing,
Snowman!
Joseph,Jack Frost,Joyful Jingling,
Jesus!
Lowing,Laughter,Lords a Leaping,
Lovelight!
Wonder,Walnuts, Winter Worshipping,
Wassail!
Incense,Infant, Icicles Icing,
Ivy!
Elves,Eating,Emmanuel Exulting,
Eggnog!

Mystic,Miracle,Mirth and Meaning,

 Merry ChristMas!

Buffy
Merry Christmas !
On Behalf of Dogs the World Over

I've been engaged in a unique research project over the last 5 years, and I am in the process of submitting my manuscript for publication.
I was inspired in my work by the writings of Carl Sagan, who wrote eloquently and enthusiastically about his love affair with science.  My novel idea also drew inspiration from the love affair of my master with
wines.  Yes, I found his book "Wine For Dummies" in the bookcase, and decided to pursue a project that he might find equally interesting, given his proclivity for aged, earthy, terroir influenced liquids.  You are probably already onto my train of thought, and may have guessed that my research has been in the area of fine, aged milk bones, buried for varying numbers of years in assorted soils and disparate climates. The influence of the soil is captured in the matrix of the bonemeal, the water table in the area lends a particular crunchiness to the end product, the organic nutrients that bathe the bone lend a certain carbon footprint to the taste of the final product.  The practical implications of this research are numerous, as dogs will  soon require their own space in the cellar to preserve and store their bones, after requisite aging in the earth.  The Bone Cellar will be a place that a dog can take his canine visitors to munch a bone, and perhaps have a bite of grass. You may want to contact your local contractor in order to get started on this project. The wonders of science inspired all of this, thanks Carl.

The scientific process; hypothesis and experimentation, followed by theory and application was a part of animal history before it had the name "science". Animals tried different strategies to find shelter, to locate food, to find out what foods were safe to eat. The ones who guessed right survived! At some point language developed, in the Broca area in the brain, and these findings could be communicated. Budding scientists learned from their elders and knowledge built upon knowledge. The written word developed and the process accelerated.  Nowadays there are many practitioners in various occupations who devote their lives to the pursuit of new knowledge, to the elaboration of theories that unify that knowledge with existing understanding, and the application  of theory to social and commercial benefit.  Humans have used the simple objective process of experimentation and application and changed the world; for good in areas of medicine, quality of life, technology and understanding of physical processes; but also for worse as the process can be used for good or evil depending upon the will of the scientist, or the society.  Human nature remains the same, but the tools are much more powerful. Science is a tool not a religion. The result of its inquiries may speak to how people behave and why they behave as they do.  It provides information, but humans must decide what is done with the facts and tools provided. Gulp!   

A dog investigating aged milkbones in an effort to please his palate, and maybe make a little money on the side, probably won't be restricted by society, or subject to politics and propaganda. If the dog's findings threaten some other milkbone maker's income, he's likely to find his theories under attack, and his product criticized, regardless of its merits.  You'll often see science and its findings subject to withering attacks, whenever it threatens the status quo, powerful interests, accepted prejudices, deeply ingrained ideas.  "Truth" even when it is objectively derived, is politicized and twisted to fit the agendas and interests of various factions. Because science has produced wondrous tools like the internet, false information can be disseminated and cloaked in a veneer of truth, just enough to fool the uneducated populace.  A dog must beware, question his own assumptions and others , winnow the wheat from the chaff, if he wants to know the "truth" of things.  Truths can be photoshopped, and become unrecognizable by the time they reach the public.

The independent mind, searching for new knowledge , inquiring of the universe and receiving an answer, is representative of the best aspects of being human, or dog.  What society does with that information, the good and the  bad, is often taken out of the hands of the seeker and discoverer. Many dogs, never educated in the process of science, will fail to recognize the manipulation, will never question the source, or burrow for the basis of attacks on knowledge. Whenever people or parties tell you to ignore the findings coming from "elites" , universities, researchers and intellectuals, use the tools and process science has given you and do some research yourself.  History books will reveal much about the travails scientists have endured, when new knowledge meets entrenched interests. Science is often self correcting, as any assertion is tested within the community, and questioned by other scientists who will . The prize is truth, to a true scientist.

I'm going to go out and check my milkbone stashes, and see what exquisite tastes may have developed in the various soils.  Even if my experimentation yields no commercial gain, I'll have gained unique knowledge, inquired of the cosmos, and received an answer.  The fact that my stomach will be full by the end of my observation is no small side benefit.  You might want to research a bottle of wine tonight, taste the influence of the earth, the input from the climate. If anyone asks what you're celebrating, tell them you're doing an experiment.  I'm sure they'll believe you:)

Buffy's Brain
(As Transmitted Through HP Computer)

Some humans possess a preternatural cognoscence when it comes to their observation, description and analysis of the animal psyche, and the social structures that result from its actions in the world. Just as there are Einsteins and Hawkings in the realm of physics, there are people like Samuel Clemens, better known as Mark Twain, who display rare insight into the workings of society and culture.  Mark Twain wrote about dogs and humans, with wit, humor and occasional satire and sarcasm.  Novelist, essayist, humorist, social critic, he was called by William Faulkner "the father of American Literature."  I've been pawing through the master's books and found a novel by Twain called the "Adventures of Huck Finn" and I devoured it in short order.  (No, I didn't eat the thing, I'm a literate dog don't you know) .

Twain was a genuis because he saw the greatness that exists in the canine form.  

"The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven, not man's."

"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you.  This is the principal difference between a dog and a man."

"Heaven goes by favor; if it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in."

His essays were usually humorous, he recognized the power of laughter in imparting philosophy and wisdom.

"Humor is mankind's greatest blessing."

"Humor is the great thing, the saving thing after all.  The minute it crops up, all our hardnesses yield, all our irritations, and resentments flit away, and a sunny spirit takes their place. " 


 I'm thinking about setting off on my own dog adventure, building a raft and taking it down the pond across the way. It's not the Mississippi, but one must make do.  I'll encounter colorful characters, chase rabbits and catch fish with my bare teeth. There'll be no "sivilizin" me.  I'll bark with a southern dialect, and days will be lazy and long.  I hope to meet Tom and Becky, and Jim. I reckon  Injun Joe won't dar'st make an appearance whilst the gang now has a watchdog, Buffy!  (Betwixt you and me, I hope to hunt me up some good ol' southern cooking whilst on my Tom and Huck and Buff adventure.)  By the time my journey ends, and I arrive back home, I'll be a changed dog I'm sure. Adventures and experiences in the world often create increased wisdom and understanding in a dog by the end of the story. If adventures and experiences aren't available to you on this particular day, I suggest vicarious travels through the imagination in the pages of a book by Twain. I recommend the one about dogs:)

The Buff
 (That's What Tom and Huck Call Me)
Southern Dog